"I have something really profound to tell you. Something that is of the utmost importance that you understand this. Listen closely...very closely." Dija leaned her ear towards the voice attentive to the next words.
"YOU ARE NOT SUPER WOMAN!!"
Yes. I have been reminded many times in the past that I need to take time and rest. But this past week has been a back handed-slap-to-the-face of a reminder. I struggled with sharing this particular issue in my blog for a few days. But after praying and thinking about, it I've received confirmation that sharing your struggles can be a good thing.
A few years ago I was experiencing, severe dizziness and vertigo with my second pregnancy. My doctor ordered MRI's to make sure that my arteries and veins in my brain were all clear-which they were. But they were not expecting to find other results that wanted them to check for Multiple Sclerosis among other things. When the neurologist mentioned "spinal tap" I got a little freaked out. Anyway I was told to get another MRI in a year. Amidst the shock of the results and the pregnancy needless to say it has been over 4 years since I followed up. This past summer I started experiencing weird things like numbness and severe pain on the right side of my face. I thought it was coming from my wisdom teeth. A trip to the dentist, and I was quickly pointed in the direction of getting my teeth out (I have posted on this before). on the journey of tooth extraction, I seemed to have the toughest time getting into an emergency dental clinic. Either it was price, or the ER office being closed or my family warning me about taking out all of my wisdom teeth that stopped me from accomplishing the removal of my "way in the back" teeth. THANK GOD for all of these road blocks because after I FINALLY got in some 7 months later, panoramic x-rays showed that my teeth were perfectly fine. It turned out it might be nerve pain. Which is fine - I guess- but the nerve they are talking about starts in the brain. Great! I come in for tooth pain and I find out my brain is malfunctioning! (Just kidding, mom!)
Then began the discussion of possibilities. "Well it could be stress, or it could be trauma from your years as a gymnast...or it could be a growth pressing on the nerve from the brain." Said the young doctor. "Don't be nervous". He added.
NERVOUS? WHO'S NERVOUS?!! Just because you put the words "brain" and "growth" in the same sentence doesn't mean I'm NERVOUS! Needless to say there is a large expanse of possibilities.
Last night at rehearsal, I felt very led to share with my cast members what was going on. I tried to fight it even though the pain was reaching vomit levels. But I still felt like I should share because I know these are praying individuals and they have others praying for us as well. I shared that I was going to the doctor tomorrow (which was today) and I was a little scared. Now don't get me wrong-I believe that God is in control of my life 100%. BUT I'm human. I have my moments, and last night, in that much pain-was one of the moments. But the funniest thing happened. Things didn't get super somber and dark in the sanctuary because I shared something personal. They prayed for me, listened and validated me, and then...well...started telling jokes and stories about near death experiences they had! I know it sounds twisted, but by the end of the rehearsal we were all laughing our butts off! It ministered to me so much! If they could survive all of those crazy things it proved that God is really in control of our mortal bodies! HA! This morning I woke up refreshed. I woke up with a lot less pain and I woke up with a smile remembering the stories from last night.
I got to see how God wants the body of Christ to function. I was able to lean on my brothers and sisters in Christ in that pain filled moment. I didn't have to shoulder the pain alone. Like when Simon had to help Jesus with the cross on the way to Calvary, WE as the body must help each other shoulder our crosses. I can't even begin to explain the magnitude of what their love taught me. Praise God!
Oh and by the way I found out I have to get another MRI and start some medication for nerve pain...and I'm totally okay. God's in control. In fact, I'm going to treat myself to a much deserved massage!
Have a blessed day! Please leave a COMMENT!
